Questions

I tend to ask lots of questions.  And, yes, if you know me, you know that I have lots of answers as well.  In general, I talk plenty.  A lot.

But you also know that I am thoughtful.  I'm always trying to figure things out.  And, as a Christ follower, I wish that I could understand many things much better than I do.  I'd love to be able to live better, live different, more sin free, more pain free for me & others.

If I could only understand, then I could fix it.

Or at least try my best.

If I could only understand it, then I could accept it.

Well, maybe accept it better.

I look at the world around me.  Pain.  Injustice.  Problems. So much I wish I could change.

And more than just the nameless, faceless masses I look at the lives of those I love.  I see their distress.  I hear their pain. I feel their struggle.  I grieve their questions.

How.  How did this happen?  We'd like to know.  In order to understand.  To keep from making the same mistake again.  If that is possible.  Or simply to be satisfied with an answer.  Even if it still hurts.  At least we know how it happened.  We can understand.  Or we can assign blame.  The knowledge of how gives a small sense of control.

Why.  Why did this happen?  We always want to know.  It helps to have an explanation.  But sometimes there is not  one.  Or the one we get just seems so wrong.  Unjust.  Difficult.  Painful.  There is nothing wrong with the question why.  But - when faced with something that seems unanswerable or terribly difficult - it is not always the most productive question.

What.  For a Christ follower in the midst of difficulty the best question may be what.  Trusting God's sovereignty - that He either causes or allows all things that touch my life - I can ask how & why, but what may be the best question to move ahead. Specifically: What can I learn from this circumstance?  

It's a humble posture.  A learning posture.  A trusting posture.  A mind that is settled on the sovereignty of God. A heart that rests in the love of God.  A spirit that says something like this:

God, I believe you control all things.  Anything affecting my life you have either caused or allowed into my life.  Everything affecting my life you can use for your glory & my growth.  So, God, while I'm here, in the midst of this difficult circumstance, what would you have me learn?

Questions are many.  Answers may be few.  God is One.  Seek Him.

But if from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find him if you seek him with all your heart and with all your soul.  Deuteronomy 4:29

Who.  That's one more question.  And this who - the Ultimate Who - can provide an answer to every question.  If from there.  Wherever your there is.  Whatever circumstance.  Whatever trouble.  Seek Him.

My Bag

I have a bag.  My bag.  It is, officially, a monogrammed - because my wife is nice like that - Land's End Square Rigger Attache.  Functional with just the right type of interior pockets.  Comfortable with soft handles, a wide shoulder strap, a big zipper & oversized zipper pulls.  Durable with heavy cotton canvas construction.  Faded with years of service.  Raggedy with... There.  I said it.

My bag doesn't just look worn out anymore.  It is worn out.  In my hand are some thick cotton threads.  And, as you can see, the threads aren't part of the handle anymore.  These poor threads are now unattached.  They came off.  My bag is starting to fall apart.  My bag is beginning to wear out.  My bag is becoming raggedy.

Forlorn from thread removal, I conducted an inspection of the entire bag.  Sadly, I must report that handle issues are not alone.  The big zipper is failing on the lower left corner.  There are holes wearing through the canvas at multiple spots on all four - or is that eight - corners.  And, as you can see, it just looks worn out too.

This is beginning of the end for my trusty old black - now brownish - bag.  Some day, maybe sooner than I'd like, it will be retired.  Maybe even trashed.  The zipper will completely fail.  One of the many small holes will catch & tear.  And you know the story: the repair will cost more than a new bag & there you have it.

Does my bag have you thinking about yourself?  Someone you know?  Something you own?  Some activity you do?  Asking the same questions & thinking the same thoughts that accompany about the beginning of the end?  And what about your acceptance of what you see in front of you?  Faded, worn, thread-bare?

When is it time to hold on?  When is it time to move on?

God, give us discernment to know.  Give us courage to act.

Seek the Lord while he may be found; call on him while he is near.  Isaiah 55:6

Questions from the Storm

Scottsbluff, Nebraska.  Almost Wyoming.  I had a conference there this week.  Beautiful country.  Big sky, rolling plains, semi-arid, grasslands.  And crazy cool rock formations.  As a runner & outdoor lover, I was looking forward to the chance to get run trails in Scotts Bluff National Monument & Wildcat Hills State Recreation Area.  Monday evening, after waiting out that afternoon's thunderstorm,  I “ran the rock” as a friend said of the imposing Scotts Bluff.  Tuesday evening, with storms clouds to the south looking as if they’d blow to the east, I set out to run the longer, trickier Wildcat Hills.

Near perfect.  Sixty degrees & breezy, I exulted in the single-track through forests, across meadows & along rock formations.  About an hour into my run, at the farthest point out from my car, I was greeted by dark clouds creeping over the hills as I turned south.  Five minutes later I stopped to compose the photo above.  A few minutes past that I was hunkered under a cedar-treed ledge as torrents of rain unleashed.  Then hail.  Drenched already, I prayed that the hail would let up so I might run for cover in a shelter house I believed was up the now slick hillside above me.

The hail subsided.  I thanked God & charged up the hill reaching the welcomed shelter soaked to the bone.  There, thankful for three walls & a roof, I waited for the rain to stop.  I prayed, sang, thought, & moved around to stay warm.  An hour later.  Just about dried out.  The rain stopped.  I took the cue & ran the sticky access road as quickly as I could one mile back to my car.  Reaching the parking lot, the sky opened up once more.  But I made it.  Thankful for the beauty of creation.  Thankful for the adventure.  Thankful for the ability to run.  Thankful for God’s grace.  Even in rain & hail.

Life is like my Wildcat Hills run.  Ups & downs.  Beautiful & fearsome.  Smooth & rocky.  Gorgeous & ugly.  Hot & cold.  Exhilarating & painful.  Breezy & stormy.

Was there ever a moment in that run when God didn’t know where I was?  What I was doing?  That He loved me?  Was there ever a moment in which He could not control the natural forces He created?  Yet, for whatever reason, he allowed me to experience every minute of it.  And I wonder, why is it so easy for me to doubt God’s love or question His purpose in the hard times?  Yet I am not so quick to acknowledge His blessing in the good times?  Why can’t I accept the storms as part of life?  Seek the shelter I can?  Make the best of the time?  And ask God what He wants me to learn from it?

Flattened Out

Springing to action on my four year old's lunch box you see Batman and the bad guys.

PB&J.  Milk.  Fruit snacks.  Batman.  Bad guys.  The perfect preschool boy lunch combo.

This heinous corps of comic character villains were flinging around my office.  Locked in post-PB&J combat with Batman they struggled.  Until my son spoke directly to me while holding up the round-bellied, tuxedoed Penguin, "This bad guy got flattened out.  Then he got pumped back up again to be a nice guy."

How many of us have to be flattened out before we can be nice?

How many times must we be humbled before we drop our pride?

What pain will we suffer before we ask for help?

How many sleepless nights before we seek godly counsel?

He mocks proud mockers, but gives grace to the humble. Proverbs 3:34

You save the humble, but bring low those whose eyes are haughty.  Psalm 18:27

If only nicer, kinder, gentler, more Christlike was as easy as only one flattening and pumping.

Post a comment to share the learnings of your flattenings.

Traffic Light

Pine Lake.

Old Cheney.

Highway 2.

48th.

40th.

33rd.

27th.

Southwood.

Every cross street.

With a traffic light.

On my way to work.

Where I stopped.

This morning.

At.

All.

Of.

Them.

Gave me time to think.

How often, when I wanna zoom through life my foot on the pedal going my direction with no plans but my own in mind, does God have a traffic light?

To.

Slow.

Me.

Down.

Psalm 139:16 says, "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

God created you.  He knows you.  He loves you.

Seek Him.  Trust Him.  He will answer.

Next time the traffic light of life turns red, don't speak out in frustration, don't tap the steering wheel in impatience, and certainly don't run it, but stop to ask God what He wants you to know.